


Something Borrowed Something Blue

by ChewiesGirl (madametango)



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Grayson (Comics), Nightwing (Comics)
Genre: Action & Romance, F/M, Fluff, Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-28
Updated: 2017-10-28
Packaged: 2019-01-25 11:14:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12530064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madametango/pseuds/ChewiesGirl
Summary: When you’re a man it’s not easy to woo a modern independent woman.It’s even harder when you’re a superhero with a secret identity and a crazy interfering family!





	Something Borrowed Something Blue

HE is dark, he is night - a late night vigilante aiming to keep the streets of Bludhaven or Gotham City safe in a never-ending fight against evil.  
He is Nightwing.  
He is…………..  
Never going to work with store-bought pasta sauce again.  
Dick struggled with the jar of sauce trying his hardest to relieve the top from the jar without using so much strength that the jar shattered (that had happened before) trying his hardest to get at the sauce inside while slowly watching the meat in the pan turn from “nicely browned” to something approaching shoe leather.  
He could handle the Joker, swing effortlessly from building to building hundreds of feet up in the air but one little jar of “Paul Newman’s own spaghetti sauce” and he was all at sea.  
It was nerves.  
He knew it.  
He was having performance issues and the night was still young.  
Truth be told he’d never really dated a “normal” everyday woman before, not really and it scared him to death like no super villain ever could.  
He leads such a dangerous life, married to his job, to the suit, to his strange crazy bat family and she was, well Amelie was, she was…………. a librarian.  
Well yes, he had dated before – there was a long line – longer than he cared to admit, to be honest. Bruce had muttered something about serial monogamy. but well that was the Black knight kettle calling the Night Wing pot black or something like that.  
And that was different, they were colleagues (and the occasional super-villain) not some woman he had flirted with for months down at the main Gotham municipal library. She didn’t know who he was, well beyond being a caring older brother who took his little brother to the Library to work on his assignment (much better to get Damian in a public place to do his much over-due history paper – he was less likely to cause havoc and destruction in a public place). She thought he was sweet, they talked and now he swung by the library every other day on some pretext or other.  
And yesterday he had finally asked her out.  
And she’d said no.  
But he’d persisted.  
She had three weeks of night shifts, very few days off and then she was going away to visit her family in Central City.  
So, he’d get creative.  
He was Night Wing.  
He could think outside the square.  
He could do anything.  
His face turned red and twisted the lid again – hard.  
Yeah, he could anything but he still couldn’t open a jar of fucking tomato sauce.  
This was a joke.  
If Damian, Bruce or Jason ever found out about this he’d be a laughing stock.  
Of course, Alfred would be worse.  
He could almost hear him.  
“This is what you get for not working with fresh ingredients Master Dick!”  
This is what I get for not going over to the mansion and getting the cook to do this for me – he muttered.  
He looked at the clock – she’d be here in 20 minutes and she only had an hour’s break for dinner. He needed to get the sauce simmering, the spaghetti on, the table set and the wine poured before showering, shaving and dressing. And here he was struggling with a jar lid as the clock ticked steadily towards date-night. Such as it was.  
He sighed.  
And kind of hoped for a late night call out from Bruce and Damian.  
At the moment, a mission, an incident, a bad-guy unleashing untold mayhem on the city of Gotham would be better than this.  
Let’s face it, it really was easier to kill the bad guys and save the city than to cook for a woman. And now he was realizing it would have been easier to order in than resort to these half-arsed measures.  
He was a superhero in a super bind and what do you do in that case? Other than kissing your shapely arse goodbye?  
You call for back-up.  
And he needed it bad.  
But who?  
That’s the thing?  
Who would know how to solve this particular conundrum, and would only mildly make his life hell?  
He swept down the contact list of his mobile phone searching for the perfect solution. He missed his mother, a mother would know what to do but he was a superhero and very few of them had mother’s so that was a no go.  
He tried Alfred but the man was having a rare night off and his phone went to message bank with a long list of where various members of the family could find common household items. He sighed, while Alfred was a clever man and had anticipated Bruce’s need to find the remote, Jason’s need for chocolate and Damian’s need for a soldering iron (what the hell a 13-year-old would need one of those for he didn’t know and he sure as hell wasn’t going to ask) but there was no mention of him and defiant jar lids.  
There was nothing else for it.  
He scrolled the list again and touched the icon.  
It rang several times before she answered, his stomach tying in knots while it did. Was it really kosher to ring your ex to get tips for date night? Would she answer him? What the hell was the etiquette with this? They were friends now, friends and colleagues so it was okay?  
Oh god.  
He almost hit the button to end the call, his finger poised when she finally answered.  
“Hey Grayson, what’s up?” she asked quietly into the phone – background noise filtering through too. She was out. She had to be out. Was she on a date? He didn’t know how he felt about that – they’d only what he thought, they’d only been over for six months. He felt he felt…………….hypocritical.  
“Is there an emergency?” she continued  
“No, I mean yes, I mean well not a criminal one I just…………”  
She chuckled.  
“Spit it out boy blunder,” she groaned in the background he could hear people talking and cutlery tinkling.  
“Ah Barbara, Babs – I can’t get the lid of the pasta jar without breaking it,” he said quietly and haltingly.  
And she laughed.  
Of course she bloody did.  
It was funny – Nightwing – savior of Gotham – brought to his knees but a jar of tomatoes.  
“Oh god no Dick, too funny and you thought you’d ring me on date-night and ask,” she wheezed still killing herself laughing.  
“Just put a butter knife under the lid and lift until you hear the pop,” she added saying something muffled to whoever she was sitting with.  
“Thanks, Barbara. So you're on a date? Anyone I know,” he asked as he regained his composure and a little self-respect.  
“It’s not that guy Bill from the police department is it?”  
Barbara groaned.  
“We’ve broken up Grayson.”  
“But he’s a bit of a jerk, Babs…..”  
She sighed.  
“Night, DICK!”  
She hung up.  
He groaned, reached for the butter knife and…………..pop……….in seconds.  
Well, who knew!

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a little fun about trying to be a superhero in an ordinary world with a super annoying adopted family. Nothing too serious.


End file.
